Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day

Mother's Day is coming up in a few days and so I have been thinking about my mother.  She has been gone for almost 9 years already.  Just can't believe it has been that long.  In going through old letters and cards that our mother had saved over the years, I found so many beautiful Mother's Day cards that she had received from family.  The picture of our mother was taken September 8, 1946 and is one of my favorites.  She had such a beautiful smile.  

A verse inside one of the cards and written by Linda Lee Elrod says it all....

Mother--such a simple word

that means so very much... 

a little hug, a great big smile,

a warm and gentle touch.

Mother--such a simple word

to cover all the ways

she's helped you out, and picked you up,

brought sunshine to your days.

Mother--such a simple word 

for someone held so dear,

for someone who is cherished
even more with every year.

Mother--such a simple word,

and, yet, there is no doubt,

six simple little letters

spell what love is all about. 

Happy Mother's Day

Birthday Celebrations at My Grandmother's

Holidays and birthdays were celebrated at my grandmother's house with very few exceptions.  Even as we grew up, got married and started our own families, celebrations were always held at her home.  It may not have always been on the actual day, but we celebrated together close to it. This remained the same until her death in January, 1978.  She started combining birthdays that were close together - it seemed we had a lot of birthdays in November and December.  The combinations usually included a member from the older generation with someone from the younger generation.

Wendy's was on the 9th and Uncle John's was on the 15th.  Wendy, my daughter and Uncle John, my grandmother's brother celebrated their birthdays together.  Please note that Wendy had all 4 of her candles, but Uncle John would only take 1.





My grandmother's was the 7th and Jenny's was the 12th.  My grandma and Jennifer, my daughter, celebrated their birthdays together.  This picture was probably taken in December, 1973.





My great-grandpa's was on the 22nd and mine was the 26th, so we celebrated our birthdays together. Taken December 26, 1971, my great-grandfather was celebrating his 90th birthday.  Pretty cool!




Then we have my brother and sister celebrating their February birthdays.  Her's was on the 12th and he's on the 14th.  Yes, that is Valentine's Day.  When he and Debby married, we had three birthdays celebrated at the same time.  Her's was on the 13th.

My grandmother was able to get all 3 sets of candles on the cake.

After the death of my grandmother in 1978, the dynamic of our birthday celebrations changed.  Our own families were growing and my grandmother's generation were soon gone.  She and her siblings were the glue to our Weisenauer family.  Once that generation was gone, each branch went their own separate way.  That's just the way it is for most families.

And, although our own birthday celebrations changed,  my brother, sister and I all got together for our mother's birthday.  Her birthday was on the 4th of July and as she would say, the whole country celebrated with her.  We started celebrating my mother's birthday up at the Lake Shafer, Monticello, IN where my sister and her family had a cottage.  Sitting outside watching the boats and skiers passing by, we ate picnic foods like fried chicken, potato salad, cole slaw, hamburgers and hotdogs.  Debby would make Mother's birthday cake and decorate it as the American flag with strawberries and blueberries.  The kids would go out tubing or swimming and even try water skiing.  Then there were some of us that would just sit outside and talk.  My mother could come up with some of the funniest stories - we'd laugh so hard, tears would stream down our faces.  


And, we would all hope that someone would be setting off fireworks towards the evening.
     








                                                             

My Sister's First Haircut

My brother e-mailed me a copy of a note I had written to my mother back in 1960.  He called it "Donna's Confession."  It's one of those stories that we laugh about today, but it sure wasn't funny Thursday night, July 14, 1960.  

The summer of 1960 - sort of a lazy summer.  I was twelve.  My sister was five.  She had long, thick dark brown hair.  It was very pretty and had never been cut except for the bangs.  My mother loved brushing her hair and making it curl.  I kept offering to cut it, but mother wouldn't hear of it.  She was not going to cut my sister's hair. 

We lived with my grandmother and my mother worked second shift at a factory.  After dinner, my grandmother would go back into her sewing room and sew.  There wasn't much to do except watch the boys play baseball across the street, not that I didn't like doing that.  I'm not sure why but on this particular Thursday night in July,  I decided I was going to just trim my sister's hair.  Just a little.  We were upstairs in our room.  I got the scissors.  I sat my sister in a chair in front of the mirror on the dresser and brushed her hair out.  It was so long and just needed to be evened out a little.  Told her to hold still and began to cut.

I never had any problem cutting my own hair.  Her hair was so thick and I just couldn't seem to cut it straight.  Kept trying to even it out, but this was not going according to plan.  My sister just sat there - have no idea what was going through her mind.  Pretty soon I had cut her hair up to her shoulders.  Not good.  I stopped.  It was too late, the damage was done.  I couldn't put it back.  Mother was going to kill me.  And, oh, if Grandma sees this I'm in worse trouble than my mother killing me.

I called my best friend, Barbara, and told her what happened.  We talked in a whisper so that my grandmother wouldn't hear.  It was before cell phones when phones were actually tied to a line in the wall.  Our phone was in the foyer right outside my grandmother's sewing room.  After we talked (I was sure I would probably never see Barbara again), I went back upstairs and wrapped my sister's head with a hairnet so it just looked like her hair was up.  Put her in bed.  Once she was in bed, she didn't move.  I wrote a note to my mother and here is what I wrote:

Dear Mommy,  I did a terrible thing to Ann you can possible guess.I got my wish, but I wish I didn't do it.  Ann likes it, but she is afraid she will get in trouble or I will.  I know I will but she didn't do nothing except move.  I cut her hair!  I was only going to even it up, but she moved and then I had to cut more off.  I'm sorry, very sorry but don't tell Grandma what I did.  I thought I better tell you what I did instead of you finding out about it yourself.  You'd be madder if I tried to hide it.  I save her hair.   Donna.   Thursday July 14 - 1960 

After writing the note (did you notice how I tried to weasel out of it being my fault and that my sister liked her haircut?), I also got in bed and as far down in the covers as I could get.  She was going to be so mad.  When my mother got home that night, I was still awake.  She came upstairs and into our room.  She saw the note and picked it up.  She read it.  And oh, was she mad.  She yelled and cried.  I didn't say a word.  I think she was afraid to spank me, she was so mad.  She would say that this was the worst thing I ever did. 

At the time, I knew that I had done something that hurt my mother and I really was very sorry.

Here is a picture of my mother with my sister and brother soon after my horrific crime.  Please note that I am not in the picture - I was probably still locked up in the dungeon.  Yes, I was still in the dungeon, please note how happy my brother is;  just all smiles isn't he.....and my sister?  She doesn't seem too upset with her new haircut.  Yes, Eddie and Annie seem to be doing just fine without me while I was wasting away in the dungeon.      

A Special Mother

My brother, Eddie, was 6 years old and I was 7.  Our sister, Ann Elizabeth, had been born in February, 1955 so she was about 8 months old and my beautiful and loving mother, Joan (Rebecca Joan) Smith Beheler

A Special Mother

My mother is no longer with us but will live in my heart forever.  She passed away September 9, 2008 at the age of 87.  She had suffered from dementia with lewy bodies.  Her happiness was her home, being surrounded by her "pretties" and her privacy.  This disease took that away from her.

My mother's greatest gift was her unconditional love for my brother, sister and I.  She raised us kids on her own, working in a factory until she retired.  Growing up as young children in the early '50s, it's amazing what she accomplished through hard work and perseverance.  Although, she had to work outside the home, the rest of her time was devoted to us kids.  She loved us and talked to us about everything.  She would buy records (45s) and play them on our record player.  We'd sing and dance in the living room.  She would read to us from the Bible, especially stories about how Jesus loved little children.

She was also very creative.  She made up her own stories and we loved listening to them when we were little.  We could play with our toys in the living room - I don't think she ever told us not to mess anything up.  We were poor, but we didn't know it because of her unconditional love for us.  Did she ever get mad at us?  Well, the only time she would get mad was if my brother and I would fight.  She did not like fighting at all.  Oh, and maybe the time I cut my sister's hair that had never been cut before ..... we'll just leave that for another story.

My mother enjoyed collecting things and going to auctions and never, ever threw anything away.  She had always saved newspapers even when we were little kids.  She'd like to cut out recipes and fashion advertisements - well, just about anything that caught her attention.  When grocery stores started selling dinnerware in the '50s and '60s, she started buying dinnerware - she liked every pattern!  When she retired, she started going to auctions and really started collecting.  In her eyes, anything old, especially glass, was beautiful and special.  I don't think any auctioneer had to put back a box due to no bidders if she was in the audience.  Most items were still in the boxes that she brought home from the auctions, still carefully wrapped in the same newspapers.  She also loved to read and belonged to about every book club there was.  And, I would almost bet that her Avon rep received sales awards having my mother as her customer.  She saved all of our clothes, our toys and school papers as we were growing up.

It took us about 3 1/2 years to go through all her things.  She had always said we would have fun going through her pretties.  Although none of us were convinced at the time, she was right.  My brother, sister and I found a new closeness that we had not shared in a long time.  Not only did we find our childhood memories, but we also found things including her written personal thoughts that have brought an awareness about how unique and wonderful our mother was.

At times there are tears, but then there is laughter, so, yes Mother, we are having fun going through your treasures.  You see, these "things" are our wonderful memories, too.

We are still going through pictures and letters and trying to put together the puzzle pieces of our family history.  We are in the process of trying to identify as many people in the many pictures that we have inherited.  Along with the old letters, research and memories, we are hoping to put together the living story of our family history for our children and grandchildren.